does this look comfortable? because it really is. lying in a room with royal blue walls with the person you love behind you. I like it when Gus is behind me because it makes me feel safe. if there's one area of my body that I've always felt scared to leave unprotected it's my back. so when Gus is behind me it feels safer and I feel protected, like now nothing can harm me.

all it is is that I cannot differentiate what will end up

making me happy and what will end up throwing

me under an eighteen wheeler with a redneck driver

uncertainty is the most disconcerting feeling I think

it is like putting your hand into a black box and someone

telling you, inside there might or might not be a tarantula

like life telling you, if you do this,

ahead there might or might not

be a fucking huge door slamming

in your face