I hate being on my period. I never used to be the kind of person to go through PMS, simply because there wasn't much to piss me off. but now that there's Gus... he gets the brunt of it, mostly. it was stupid: me pacing back and forth the room, crying about how he has to be more serious and committed/he lying on the bed laughing away. finally I snapped, what the hell are you laughing at and he said, that your period is like alcohol and I said, wtf and he said, it's like you can't control any of your emotions anymore. and now I realize I probably really did seem like that. sooooooo I hate being on my period.

just finished 'never let me go' by kazuo ishiguro. deciding whether to watch the movie... mainly because there's one bit in the book where I got quite scared, so I'm thinking I'd be even more freaked about it being acted out at 2.10am. but, for carey mulligan & andrew garfield *drool* MAYBE I will. keira knightley as Ruth? YUCKS i hate her so much. she was so gross in Pirates, I've never gotten over that

anyway the book was quite awesome as it turned out, very heartbreaking towards the end. it's a topic we've often discussed in philosophy, not exactly the idea of clones but of life being nothing more than a technicality, practical in someone else's usage but not your own. and the idea of 'souls' has always been difficult to pin down. when someone is especially cruel, you'd say 'he doesn't have a soul', but we know he does. so what exactly does that mean, anyway? only people who do good things have souls? it's hard to speak about it without getting everything jumbled, and I've had one too many ferrero rochers to be thinking clearly. I think the one main part that really got to me though was, as usual, the idea of two people in love being forcefully separated, and their inability to do anything about it. it's a very emotional theme for me, I can't stand the idea, like I really really hate it

I think the next book I will read is 'the golden compass' by philip pullman, though if I find anything better in lieu of it I will read that first. I don't know why I'm putting it off a bit, but I am... so far I've liked all the books I've read and I hope to keep up this favorable streak. school starts next week, so I suppose I must get most of the leisurely reading out of the way before readings start to pile up. bidding tomorrow morning! I pray I am not the only person in class

UPDATE:
'never let me go' the movie was surprisingly good! I mean I already knew the whole story but I still cried when Tommy went into his rage, and also when Kathy said quietly, "There are no deferrals, Tommy." I think the casting was quite well done. Carey Mulligan really pulled everything together, and I think Andrew Garfield may have overdone the slight retard factor, but overall he was the one that made me so sad. Keira Knightley was sucky as shit tho, expected. think they could've gotten someone better. but everything else was actually quite good for me, including the soundtrack: lone violins always get me. I enjoyed it! surprisingly, considering how often movies never live up to the books.