I think recently I've been searching for affirmation in the wrong places. I've been looking for it in rankings, in grades... trying to justify things by searching for approval from all the wrong people. It's horrible. I have to remind myself, there's only a few people's approval I really need to care about: God, my parents and myself. That's really it. I need to stop worrying what other people think about my decisions, what their opinions are. Stop fretting when I see their slightly upturned noses or questioning looks.

If we only have one life why do we waste it trying to live it the way other people want us to

Spent the day with Gus. First at my aunty's place for CNY (more gambling. We won a fair bit) then to Element @ Amara Hotel for dinner with his family. Dinner was insaaaaaaaaaaaneeeeeee. Everyone got a lobster, but half his family doesn't eat lobster, so between two of us we had FIVE lobsters. Plus tempura, peking duck, stir fried scallops, ee fu noodles, crab, crayfish, sashimi and sushi!!! Ice cream + little chocolate cakes, honeydew and an ever delightful chocolate fountain = S.T.U.F.F.E.D

Then he sent me home and we watched two episodes of American Idol and funny videos on youtube. Talked for about another hour plus or so, just cracking up at funny things. We had original plans to go to Zouk bcs mstrkrft s tnght but I'm kinda glad we decided not to. Don't think I would've fancied being stuck between that mass of human sweat, inebriated AGAIN... There's something I hate and love about drinking. That initial buzz is pretty rad but when you start to become aware of that clingy discomfort in your skin it's fcking annoying