today i had school from 2-8 but didn't die. on the contrary it was quite alright i think. life gets more boring as the routine of school starts to settle in. this semester i'm more prepared, more excited for it in a sense, so school isn't as dreadful for me as it is for some other people. still, there is that mundane aspect of it that kind of pulls my life onto this treadmill that doesn't stop until december. that's probably why i don't feel like blogging much nowadays.

still, some things are worth remembering. i went down to Mindsville @ Napiri last saturday as part of NUS CSC's regular volunteering programme. it was an orientation for new volunteers such as myself. firstly, Mindsville is a home for intellectually disabled individuals. so they handle mainly individuals who battle autism, down's syndrome, overall mental retardation or sometimes specific learning disabilities. however they deal with individuals with high support needs, meaning they are not capable of integrating into normal community and require very specialized care for their growth and development. individuals can be as old as 50 - 60 years old.

NUS CSC goes to Mindsville to carry out activities that help stimulate interaction and growth, to impart lessons for integrating into society and, of course, simply to help. unfortunately the day i went down the residents were quarantined because of disease, so we didn't get to see them. personally i think i have a heart for individuals like these. there are many causes one can champion and many programmes one can volunteer at. but while looking through the list of programmes i could help out at, which included old folks homes and orphanages, i was immediately drawn to working with ID individuals. it might have something to do with the fact that my older sister has down's syndrome so i've really grown to love kids with DS (i used to watch her dance practice at the DSA).

we heard some very interesting stories. for example, Mindsville has a programme where they will select residents who are deemed capable enough to live on their own to go through sort of a test run. they will live on their own within Mindsville's compounds for a few months, and if they prove to be competent enough, they are actually moved to flats in the community. the man who talked to us about this said that once, when he went to check up on these residents, one of them pleaded with him, please don't put me back inside (Mindsville). i think the point is that even though they're lesser on the IQ and EQ scale, they're not oblivious to the stigma and societal restraints against them. they obviously understand they are different, that's why they are not initially allowed to simply roam the streets and do their own thing. but at the same time, they really want to and they really love it. there's a lot of parallels between us and them. we all love our freedom. sometimes they are placed at job placements, to earn money and to learn some skills. apparently, on their way home, some of them will go by a long route, take a huge detour to make sure nobody is following them (not in a stalker way, just someone who follows them to make sure they're alright) because they really relish the idea of independence.

when you first go into Mindsville, sometimes you hear lots of screaming. not really playful screaming, but seemingly horrific, torturous screams. obviously these screams are from the residents. for some reason, i didn't even notice it until someone mentioned it. these screams are a manifestation of the incapability of individuals with ID to accurately and appropriately express their wants and needs. vocally some are greatly impaired. communication can be difficult. so sometimes they simply scream. it is significant because it is an aspect of ID individuals that society certainly doesn't sit well with. they're "crazy", they're "retarded". immediately there's a stigma, a certain expectation against this demographic. but it's not something they can get rid of easily. part of the volunteers' jobs is to try to alleviate this problem, to teach the residents how to communicate their wants and needs effectively through gestures, words, etc.

the other day my sister took her first independent trip to school and back. she took the train herself to Bishan and back. i think it was really quite a special moment. i felt proud of her because quite awhile back she was already asking, can i learn to take the train? can i take the bus? and now that she can she really, really embraces it fully. like i said, they may not be intellectually up to par but they definitely feel the sort of constraints we as a society have imposed on them, making them dependent on people considered "normal". there is nothing wrong with this because there are only good intentions behind it, but sometimes i feel we don't give enough attention to how these individuals can actually feel displeasure and discontent and being institutionalized. that's why Mindsville tries to keep institutionalization a temporary measure, preparing them for the outside world. which is extremely noble work and i admire them greatly for that.

the next session is this saturday. i'm looking forward to it!