today was one of those days where you woke up thinking it'd be okay and it wasn't. and things got worse and worse and worse, and you almost wanted to just give up. go home and take a long nap. but then things got better, and better, and better, and you're right back to where you were in the morning. that's not a bad way to go.

what else made me feel better: filing away all my lecture notes and slides and readings into thick files that remind me of secondary school. it's not that things have to be organized. they don't. many people are productive with sheets of paper littered everywhere, not in chronological order nor according to topic. some of the brightest people are also the messiest ones. no, organization is a procrastination agent. a very good one. "omg I could study so much better if all this was neatly filed into nicely labelled sections in chronological order" BAM! four hours stapling and sorting and hole-punching and filing and making stupid dividers. but it makes you feel so good afterwards, so you decide to reward yourself with some tv or some computer time or worse. a nap. you wake up at 9pm wondering where the whole day went to, eat some dinner, then go to sleep at 11pm.

yes that was my day yesterday.

also, studying is difficult because I don't know how. I'm not sure what to do to prepare for anything except econs. I'm not sure how long essays are supposed to be for each subject, how much time should be allocated for what. everything's still too new... sucks