1. it's strange since when i was in the last days of France i wanted to come home so, so badly, and now i miss everything about europe. last night i heard some people speaking french and i literally yelled at them, "vous êtes francais?!" because what i miss is speaking french, and hearing french, and being greeted with 'bonjour' instead of 'hi'. but what i wish right now, is not to go back to europe, but to go to Japan. is that strange? i have this image in my head where i'm alone walking the streets of tokyo, in the glaring lights of shinjuku or being bathed in sakura blossoms.. something lame like that. i do not see it as running away from my problems. instead i just see it as something that will help me cope better with my problems. when is recess week again?

2. i should probably get my shit together for school starting monday. i haven't studied in 3 weeks and i literally did not go to school for one entire week due to reasons of laziness, disinterest and general lethargy... and i want to do honours year like this wtf

3. i think at the end of the day i just have to be nice, do the bigger thing, approach everything with a big heart, forgiveness, self-control, compassion and kindness. even if it hurts me, i think i must do everything i can not to let this hurt translate into something awful. so i must always smile, always do good, always be generous, even if i don't feel like it, and one day i think, hopefully, it won't be all for nothing